Massachussetts Town Terrorized By Battle Rapping Teens In Sandals

A story so scary it could have been written by Stephen King, the small town of Charlton, Massachusetts has been facing a crisis so large that it may need to call the federal authorities to assist. On Monday, the police department posted on Facebook that a group of 2-3 males wearing open-toed sandals in broad daylight pulled up on three other teenage males in a black SUV and challenged those young teens on foot to battle rap or "spit some bars" as the public police report puts it.

The story only gets better the further you dive into it. One of the battle rapping assailants is described as a "male with brown hair a pale complexion, wearing gray pants and open-toed sandals" (was he wearing socks underneath those sandals though?). He reportedly got out of the car and started rapping at the peasants going for a walk, while the occupants in the car asked the kids walking if they wanted to "spit some bars."

It ended peacefully as the kids said no and the microphone fiends drove off presumably to go find some new victims of their molten hot bars, though no other lyrical assault was reported that day.

The police would like to make it clear that this does not appear to be an abduction, but just suspicious and frightening activity they are investigating.

The incident has gone somewhat viral and as a result, the Charlton police department has had to defend itself. They say they aren't investigating rap being sung in Charlton (it is being spit here), but rather are concerned that older individuals are approaching younger children on the street.

So watch out for roaming bands of rappers looking to spit bars at any point. They may even have a fire mixtape to give you.